forgiveness..

read this in today's TODAY "Focus on the Family" column
tink i've read the same article in those forwarded emails before
thot it's quite meaningful
jot the quote down before i forget

"Forgiveness is giving up my right to hurt you for hurting me. I think that's one of the most profound definitions of forgiveness I've ever heard. It's only when we've truly given up the right to retaliate, that we've truly forgiven."

~Dr. Archibald Hart

How do you know that he is THE ONE?

got this off the discussion forum of my company intranet
many frens have asked me the above question before
and to be honest
i cant really give an answer to it
i tink the answer can be found in the below article
enjoy. =)

===================================================

DID I MARRY THE RIGHT PERSON?

During one of our seminars, a woman asked a common question. She said, 'How do I know if I married the right person?'

I noticed that there was a large man sitting next to her so I said, 'It depends. Is that your husband?' In all seriousness, she answered 'How do you know?'

Let me answer this question because the chances are good that it's weighing on your mind.

Here's the answer.

EVERY relationship has a cycle. In the beginning, you fell in love with your spouse / partner . You anticipated their call, wanted their touch, and liked their idiosyncrasies (unconventional behavior/habit).

Falling in love with your spouse wasn't hard. In fact, it was a completely natural and spontaneous experience. You didn't have to DO anything. That's why it's called 'falling' in love... Because it's happening TO YOU.

People in love sometimes say, 'I was swept of my feet.' Think about the imagery of that expression. It implies that you were just standing there; doing nothing, and then something came along and happened TO YOU.

Falling in love is easy. It's a passive and spontaneous experience. But after a few years of marriage, the euphoria (excitement) of love fades. It's the natural cycle of EVERY relationship. Slowly but surely, phone calls become a bother (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome (when it happens), and your spouse's idiosyncrasies, instead of being cute, drive you nuts.

The symptoms of this stage vary with every relationship, but if you think about your marriage, you will notice a dramatic difference between the initial stage when you were in love and a much duller or even angry subsequent stage.

At this point, you and/or your spouse might start asking, 'Did I marry the right person?' And as you and your spouse reflect on the euphoria of the love you once had, you may begin to desire that experience with someone else. This is when marriages breakdown. People blame their spouse for their unhappiness and look outside their marriage for fulfillment.

Extramarital fulfillment comes in all shapes and sizes. Infidelity is the most obvious. But sometimes people turn to work, a hobby, a friendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances.

But the answer to this dilemma does NOT lie outside your marriage. It lies within it. I'm not saying that you couldn't fall in love with someone else.

You could.

And TEMPORARILY you'd feel better. But you'd be in the same situation a few years later. Because (listen carefully to this):

THE KEY TO SUCCEEDING IN MARRIAGE IS NOT FINDING THE RIGHT PERSON; IT'S LEARNING TO LOVE THE PERSON YOU FOUND.

SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. It'll NEVER just happen to you. You can't 'find' LASTING love. You have to 'make' it day in and day out. That's why we have the expression 'the labor of love.' Because it takes time, effort, and energy. And most importantly, it takes WISDOM. You have to know WHAT TO DO to make your marriage work.

Make no mistake about it. Love is NOT a mystery. There are specific things you can do (with or without your spouse) to succeed with your marriage.

Just as there are physical laws of the universe (such as gravity), there are also laws for relationships. Just as the right diet and exercise program makes you physically stronger, certain habits in your relationship WILL make your marriage stronger. It's a direct cause and effect. If you know and apply the laws, the results are predictable... you can 'make' love.

Love in marriage is indeed a 'decision'... NOT just a feeling.

Remember this always:

'God determines who walks into your life. It is up to you to decide who you let walk away, who you let stay, and who you refuse to let go.'

updates!

after skipping gym for like more than 2 weeks (oops)
and going for a biz-cum-leisure trip to taiwan
and after settling dean's ACL reconstruction op
i'm back to my gymming routine =)
and with edalene's enthusiasm in swimming
i'm gonna try to keep up all my routines again
but the yoga part is a tad difficult la
coz now dat i've got a bed-ridden neighbour
who is dying from boredom at home
i'll usually go straight home after work
gimme a small break la
hehe

oh, i've shifted the dates
of my weight measurements and gym routine posts
i've decided it's kinda boring to see them all the time
i've added a weight thingy at the side
as a friendly reminder for myself
hahaha

back to work =p

MY WEIGHT MEASUREMENTS =P

21/04/08 - 55.5 kg
31/03/08 - 57.5 kg
25/02/08 - 56.5 kg
18/02/08 - 57.0 kg
12/02/08 - 57.1 kg (oops.. all the CNY goodies' fault)
04/02/08 - got measure but forget liao (CNY week => exercise 2 days nia)
31/01/08 - 56.8 kg
28/01/08 - 57.2 kg
21/01/08 - 58.4 kg
14/01/08 - 58.2 kg
07/01/08 - 58.0 kg

i was tinking
since i posted my horrendous weight here aredi
tink i shld post my periodic weight measurements too
to motivate myself
and for u to motivate me as well
hahaa

MY EXERCISE REGIME

YOGA
3 times a week after work
tues, wed, thurs (starting 8 Jan)

SWIM
once a week
saturday morning (starting 12 Jan)
10 laps (20 lengths of the pool)

GYM
5 times a week during lunch time
mon, tues, wed, thurs, fri (starting 7 Jan)

GYM ROUTINE...
7 Jan
treadmill 15 mins
cross training machine 15 mins
bicep curl 50 reps
triceps curl 50 reps
leg raise 50 reps
ab crunch 50 reps
skipping 500 reps